Bits and Pieces

Sleep patterns recently changed. Rising earlier; seems to have effected quality of dream recall. Now tend to wake clutching convoluted fragments, too nebulous to narrate...Best remembered snippets have included:

Costa Del Darfur

Sat in a travel agency, urgently determined to book a last minute package holiday. Eagerly explaining to the agent both budget limitations and an adventurous daring to embrace any destination, so long as it's-

"Cheap, hot and sunny!"

"Hmmm...Well, we've got an unbelievable deal right now" the agent exclaims and proceeds to describe the delightful details - Grand resort, great room, glorious restaurant!

Muggins is totally sold, overly excited, doesn't even comprehend what country it's in.

"Fantastic! We'll take it."

In a haze of holiday euphoria the plane glides down, a connecting coach crawls through dusty desert and suddenly we're at the hotel. Almost immediately my better half (or perhaps more accurately my "better three-quarters" as suspect that the share of good qualities is not equally divided between us) adopts a permanent scowl and an air of shocked disdain.

Perplexed I attempt to buoy her mood by entering into the holiday spirit with frivolous abandonment - tempting her down to the pool, ordering room service; extravagant cocktails, sizzling snacks. But this only serves to make things worse; till finally she spits with accusing disbelief:

"You do realize where we are don't you?"

"Yeah - We're on holiday"

"We're bloody well in Darfur!"

"Oh..."

This certainly puts a dampener on the situation. To make matters worse the next morning huge clouds cluster the sky and the rest of our stay is hampered by uncharacteristically wet weather. I sulk and curse the travel agent; unable to enjoy myself in any way for fear of being admonished for forgetting "those less fortunate than ourselves" whose close proximity I've so stupidly chosen for our excessive, vulgar vacation.


Christopher "Care-Bear" Walken

On set, witnessing filming of a new Sci-Fi epic, starring non-other than the wickedly cool Walken. The scene being shot somehow seems to incorporate all of the finished special effects right now, as it's acted. Christopher Walken is some kind of alien, or highly evolved human, capable of projecting a shimmering beam of energy that shoots out like a dazzling ray from the centre of his chest.

Acting in spectacular bursts of real-life slow-motion, Walken does battle with similarly endowed beings, all radiating their own colourful laser-like emanations. The effects of the energy seems to depend on the particular power that the alien possesses. Red rays seem to melt things, blue one's immobilise, green one's calm and heal, yellow one's inflict pain etc.

Suddenly the concept feels very familiar and I quietly comment -

"It's a bit like the Care Bears isn't it?"

"Shhhh! Keep quiet!" Someone shout-whispers.

Walken glares at me and the filming continues.